How to Propose to Your Man

We women have been told many times that if a man really loves you, he will ask you to marry him. So we wait and wait and wait. It is like waiting for a ship at an airport. It never comes.

We should not be stuck waiting. If you really think that he is the person you want to spend the rest of your life with, then I suggest considering proposing to him. I know for many people it might be unusual for a woman to propose. But hey, it is 2019.

In the TV drama Sex and the City, Carrie Bradshaw asked the question, “How does a woman ask a man to marry her when the marriage proposal is designed to impress a woman, but not a man?” My opinion is, when a woman proposes, her intention is not to impress her man, but to know more about herself, about their relationship and marriage. Planning a proposal to a man gives a woman an opportunity to think about what marriage really means to her.

Like men, many women find proposing is very nerve-racking and scary. But before she asks the terrifying question, my male friend suggests a woman should ask her man if he would want her to propose. He might want to do it, and she would ruin his plan. With his “approval,” she can work on her proposal. However, times are changing so feel free to ignore his suggestion.

The next step is how to ask him to marry you. When and where is the best place to ask? More importantly, how can you do it successfully?

One of my female friends, who proposed to her then-boyfriend and got married last year, told me she did it accidentally. May, 38, had been seeing her then-boyfriend for one year before she proposed. One day after dinner, she just asked casually and accidentally, “Do you think we should get married?” He put down his chopsticks, looked at her for a few seconds and said, “Yes, of course.” That was it.

When the couple told their friends that story, many believe May could not wait any longer for his proposal, because she really wanted to get married and have a baby right away. “My friends kind of feel sorry for me that I had to ask that question myself, but I chose to; I feel cool,” she said. However, if you want to do it in a more romantic way, here is some advice to get him to say yes.

First, you need to think about the family. Most Chinese men value family a lot. If his parents really like you, the chances of him saying yes are higher.

Second, do it at his favorite place. Pop the big question when you are alone with him. You might not want too many witnesses, because he might say yes without meaning it to save you face.

Last but not least, do it in the evening. Usually, men feel more tired and lonely at night. The chances of him saying yes during a quiet and romantic evening are higher. After he says yes, you can kindly remind him that he should buy you a ring.

Related posts:

We hear words like inclusion and diversity all of the time. While we all like to think we know what those words mean, sometimes it’s the assumptions we make that creates just the opposite.